girlfriends and boyfriends

For a long time, all I thought about and wanted was the right boyfriend. I wanted a great byfriend, who treated me the best, and who was the best. Don't get me wrong, I'd still love a great boyfriend, but my goal has changed.

Now, it's not about getting the best boyfriend, it's about being the best girlfriend. I now want to work on myself, and become a better person so in the end I can be the best girlfriend, and then wife. I want to be the woman God wants me to be, no, I need to be. Before I jump into any new relationships. And then forever.

If I were to be completely honest with myself, i'm not sure i'm over the last one. I do not love Mr X, but I do however, miss him. In saying this though, I think it's more - missing affection, and fear of being alone. Nothing within me wants him back. But there is no way only three months is enough time to move on. Apparently it is, according to him. I feel sorry for his new girlfriend, she's only going to get hurt because she's a rebound. His next girlfriend will have it good though.

I did not want to talk about that. But I think it's vital for what I am saying. If not then it's no loss.

To me now, being the best girlfriend is my priority. Seeing as I am no ones girlfriend at the moment, I am trying to be the best girl or woman for God. And through Him I will become the best, which will allow me to be the best girlfriend for someone. Please don't get this wrong, Jesus will always be number one. I am trying to live every day for Him.

I've made so many mistakes in my life, but Gods grace and love is amazing and He has forgiven me. And i'm still going to make mistakes, but thats because I'm human. So don't judge me for being a christian and slipping up, because we are all human, we all make mistakes. No one is ever going to be perfect, but all we can do is keep trying. And in the end we're going to be a much better person because of the perserverance.